Mother issues

I wish I was feeling better now that I got my tribunal letter. It really hasn't helped at all. I'm still waiting to hear from the benefits office and from my psychologist (it's now been a month since I was last given an appointment). I'm going to have to phone after the weekend and I hate phones, they make me really anxious and OCD.

I'm getting worse though. My Mum wanted me to help her at an event I'd been helping her plan for work experience type stuff. I just couldn't make it. I stressed out about it all last week and then last night I just went mental. I couldn't calm my brain. I got stress IBS. I panicked. I cried. I felt sick. I couldn't sleep. Then in the morning I couldn't make myself go. I told my mum I was sick then worried all day that everyone was talking about me because I couldn't make it. Everyone will think I'm an unreliable flake and that I can't keep to any deadlines. Deadlines stress me out no end and I just freaked. I feel like a let down and a disappointment. Even now I still have stomach cramps with the stress and I got a migraine even after Mum came home and was nothing but nice to me.

I'm also having trouble with my fiance's mother and that's stressing me out. She has refused to talk to me really for the year and a half I've been with him but last week she decided to talk to me. Basically all we talked about was him and his bad ocd and how she wants to deal with it and stuff. She kept going on in strangely put monologues, ignored everything I said back to her unless she could use it to argue with him and tried to integrate herself int othe third person in our relationship. I don't mind talking to her but she shouldn't try to pass it off as getting to know me if she just wants to keep tabs on him. He's getting all angry with her and fighting with her and  stuff. And she's fighting with him and they're both claiming different things about me in their argument. He knows me better obviously but still I feel caught. And I'm starting to feel used by her and her strange behaviour and attitude are starting to get to me. I know that she has bi-polar disorder but at what point is it just her? I don't know where to go with her at all.