The After Effects

I have stressed myself to new heights during this week for one reason or another. This has resulted in a migraine of epic proportions. It's been awful. I get a huge array of symptoms with them. I lose half my vision, my hand and face go numb and tingly, I get sick, I get a really bad stomach, I can't think, sometimes I can't even speak and of course a thumping headache. I woke up at 8am with it and had flashy lights in my vision, tingly, numbness and couldn't speak on and off till lunchtime. Then I was fine all afternoon. Then it happened all over again but on the other side of my head tonight. I feel utterly appalling. Not to mention the fact that they set off my OCD. I have a complete panic attack that I'm have a stroke, going blind or have a brain tumour. Despite the fact that I've had migraine's since I was 12.

Periods of heavy stress always take a physical toll on a person. Headaches, nausea, and insomnia are the most common. Migraines are a sort of extreme version of that. I also, along with a lot of people, suffer from stress induced IBS. Stress is a very difficult process that people that don't suffer from it often don't understand. People think that our inability sometimes to function normally is all in our heads. That we are just over-exagerating how we feel and moping about. But that really isn't the case. Even if the mental state we are in isn't debilitating enough then it is often followed immediately by terrible phsical side-effects and pain. I am sometimes doubled over with stomach cramps that are induced by stress and anxiety.

I think it is hard for any person to understand how interconnected our body parts are. How something that effects our emotions can take it's toll on our physical being. How something as deep routed and untangible as thought can then menifest itself in a physical form. Even dry skin and other skin conditions can be connected to stress and anxiety related illness. It's difficult to comprehend for me even though I know it's true.

There is a school of thought that says people with mental health conditions often do not live as long as others. Or even that just people who aren't as happy live shorter lives than people who are. It's not untrue. Whilst I am not into all of the slightly hippie side of medicine I do believe that this particular angle is true. That I, with all my stress, anxiety, OCD, BDD, trust issues, depression.... That I will put such a strain on my body that I will die before someone who does not suffer from any of these things. Nothing to do with how much I exercise or how much I weigh. It is purely to do with how this all affects a person. My blood pressure is often high and so is my heart rate, not because I am unhealthy always, but because I panic myself into it. That cannot be good for my heart.

We all need to take a new attitude to mental health and what it does physically as well as what it does mentally.